Tom's prosaic blog.
This is a space to upload old writing pieces to keep track of, and to upload new exciting things that no one will read. Prosaic: lacking imagination or originality.
So what's all this then?
Tom's Prosaic Blog is a space for posts and articles about video games of various franchises, interesting things that amuse me (for example the cucumbers post) or short stories.
Everything is poorly written and awful you should not read anything here this is a terrible blog.
I'm joking please +1 and follow.
No seriously I gotta get more pageviews and I'll try to entertain you go on.
Cheers.
Monday, 5 December 2016
Wednesday, 16 November 2016
Wednesday, 13 April 2016
Wednesday, 12 August 2015
My spooki scary story. No for reals though this is true and pretty personal.
Ok so I know compared to scary ghosts and spooki scary skeletons, my story isn't as frightening. What really sticks this to memory though is its completely unexplained nature. A few years back I worked in a local supermarket of a chain I won't mention, aside that the uniforms are black. That comes in later. Anyway I was about 16-17, small and generally unexperienced, I just needed extra money while I was in college so I could get the train to see my girlfriend. Call me a modern day romantic I know. Anyway, I hated the work and often took longer breaks than I should, upstairs in the employees room. Now the store is a large square shop floor with a door at the back, leading to a single walkway. At the end of the walkway is a set of stairs leading up to the warehouse room above the shop floor, and the break room adjourning that. No other way down aside the stairs. Ok so I was on break, eating some out-of-date stock, and over the intercom I was called to the tills. I can't remember what day it was, but there were very few of us workers in that night so it seemed busy to us. There was me, an older woman who I think was called Becca, My friend Shaun, and my manager who's name I've honestly forgotten. I responded to the call, dragged myself up and out the door to cross the warehouse and down to shop floor. Now the warehouse is full of crates and those large trolley cages we use for moving stock into shop floor. As I came out the break room I saw a person duck behind one of said cages. I thought it was Shaun, as the shape was black (the uniforms remember), large and 100% a human. Arms, legs, a head, the whole lot. I called out hi, as Shaun is a bit of what some would call a 'lad', and would probably get offended if I strolled past without greeting him. I got no response. Peering round the cage as I walked up to it, I saw that there was no one there. I'd like to say I've never taken any kind of drugs or hallucinogenics, and at the time drunk rarely and sparsely so I couldn't have been effected by anything like that. The lights in the room were bright modern, so there was no flickering and no way could've created a shape like that. Plus they were directly overhead so it couldn't have been my own shadow, I was 100% done with being in that room. I legged it down the stairs, and got to the bottom, noting that the slow creaky door was shut tight. If anyone had somehow got down there super-fast it would've taken an age to shut.
I got out onto shop floor, and went to find my manager. I was still trying to be rational, and decided that if there was an intruder in the warehouse who had just hidden very well that that didn't look good on me for just walking past. I located him and asked where everyone was. He seemed confused, but told me that Becca was on tills, he had been in the office and Shaun was loading fruit by the front door. I had been the only person in the entire back of the shop.
So all this doesn't sound overly scary, but what keeps me from dismissing it as just a trick of my mind is how all the facts are stacked against it. I like horror and creepy things as much as the next guy, but I sleep just fine at night knowing it's all imaginary. My story is very true, I saw a figure. Not a shadowy haze, but a human mass which was there when all logic proves it can't have been, and that scares me to my very core. I'll never forget it.
Monday, 6 July 2015
Shattered memory fragment - Pocket Infinity exotic weapon review and guide.
Pocket Infinity
Obtaining the exotic Pocket Infinity fusion rifle is a laborious task with... ehhh, well okay rewards I guess. The Pocket Infinity is a decent fusion rifle, however the signature perk that gives the weapon its namesake is what truly makes it exotic. The weapon is very situational and plagued by ammo abundance, however once you let it free on a boss it really shines above all other fusion rifles. I'll go over the steps to earn the Pocket Infinity, then give my own opinion on the weapon and the kind of situations it performs best in.
- Obtain the Shattered Memory Fragment exotic bounty by turning in bounties to the robot in either the Vestian Outpost or the tower. There's still no real solid known method to win one of these, try turning in multiple bounties at once for a higher chance of a drop.
- Travel to Venus and locate a Damaged Ghost from the Shattered Coast. This can be found in the room in the wall on the left, just after the tunnel that leads to the Ishtar library. It's near the big Venus statue, written directions are hard so click this link to see a quick video. Anyway, pick up this Ghost, unlocking the next step.
- Kill a Vex Gatelord with the heroic modifier. Nothing new here, just speedrun the story mission in order to restore the Ghost. Bring the Ghost to the speaker so he can give you some schematics, then take the schematics to the Gunsmith.
- The long part of this quest is obtaining and dismantling 10 rare or higher quality fusion rifles. It's not particularly difficult, it just takes a long time and you'll either be spending a lot of Vanguard marks or praying for RNG. Anyway, bring the charged core you get from this back to the gunsmith.
- Kill 200 enemies in the weekly Nightfall Strike with a Fusion Rifle to stabilize the prototype. Try match the damage type with the random weekly Burn, you'll get this done a lot faster. Obviously this is easier to do against low tier enemies like Dregs and Shanks, but remember there's no pressure as you don't need to do it all in one run. Get this done and return to the Gunsmith the be rewarded with the weapon.
Well now you have the Pocket Infinity, what can it do? It's an auto-firing fusion rifle that returns around 70% of missed shots to mag, making it perfect for boss encounters. Just hold down the trigger and watch it spray into the boss, hammering it with solar rounds. However the base mag of three is pitiful and before unlocking it's signature perk the Pocket Infinity is probably the worst Fusion Rifle in the game. It was a painfully long charge time and reload speed, but it's worth it to hang in there and unlock the perks. It's the best fusion rifle in the game, but of course subjectively Fusion Rifles aren't too great anyway. Do not use this gun in the Crucible! The charge is so slow you'll get killed by anything first, and the recoil will spray your shots everywhere but the target. In PVP, as I said earlier, this beast is very situational but it's still a beast in the right scenario. Use this against bosses with Solar weaknesses, but nothing else. It has so little ammo it's not worth using it against lower tier enemies, making you rely heavily on your primary. Now this wouldn't be too bad if you had a strong exotic primary to use exclusively, but since the PI takes up your exotic slot you're forced to rely on lower tier weapons which you may or may not have.
I'd give this weapon a 6 out of 10, it's not really worth doing all the work on the bounty for what little reward you get, but when you find that right situation it really comes into it's own. Do not choose it over any of the other exotic bounties (except Super Good Advice maybe) unless you've got everything else and you want to swap up your playstyle.
Monday, 29 June 2015
What the Taken King needs to bring to Destiny
What the Taken King needs to bring to Destiny
1. Better loot
With the new ascension via Etheric light, old once-redundant gear is now top-tier again! Honestly who'd use something like the Dreg's Promise over Gjallarhorn, we need new good exotics or everyone will just keep using the best ones from the old year, just buffed up to the new level. The same goes for legendary tier, the new gun models for the House of Wolves do look good but honestly they've never had as much impact on me as the old Judgment, Shadow Price and the Saterienne Rapier. As I said for the exotics, we need good gear to outplay the old ones or I for one will just keep ascending Fatebringer every year!Gear-wise we've done better, the new armor always looks better and cooler than the last set but still the stats on the Prison of Elders gear sucks compared to the previous raid sets. Maybe that's because it's POE-won instead of a random drop so they can't make the stats too overpowered, but still it really doesn't have any application outside the Prison. Plus the new end-game shaders are god-awful. Mhmmmm I love having a bright purple-pink Hunter. The new subclasses look like they'll spice up the monotony a bit, but loot is where it really counts.
2. More Strikes/Raids
We need more strikes to keep things fresh! Having a playlist feature in the game itself implies that we're meant to grind these, but when you can literally recite the opening audio to each of the strikes and identify which one it is by the opening word you know you've played them too much. I just slip into autopilot on them now, we need a good load more, almost as many more as the original game added on, to boost up the player enjoyment. Now before anyone whines that it's too much work and that's an unrealistic number, remember they're marketing this as 'Destiny 2', set at the same price as the original game. If it's really worth that money, it'll have the same amount if not more content than the vanilla Destiny on release.
The prison of Elders is an amazing experience, I can't fault it in the slightest for it's engagement and replayability. However since Raids are a standpoint of the expansions and we've missed one out already with HOW, we really need another. I've got no doubt that we'll have a huge impressive fight with Oryx, but it seems very predictable. I'd love something like the Shadow Thief strike, where he shows up at multiple points in the raid, or even story missions, as it really hammers in that feeling of helplessness and hunting. Oryx looks incredible, so the final fight should be in multiple stages and in a huge place, not a cramped room like the other fights. I had a great idea that the final fight happens in the Tower itself, with Oryx swooping around and destroying things and attacking the Traveler itself. We've heard nothing about it really still, aside it's a big space ball, it seems right that Oryx would attack the Guardian's main source of power. This could also feature a cool mechanic where the Traveler is damaged more and more throughout the fight, adding a time element in and a sense of urgency, we'd literally be cornered and fighting on behalf of all the other Guardians. Whatever happens, it needs to be epic.
3. Primary story line progress
So... we destroyed the black garden, killed the son of a god and captured the Kell of Kells. That's all very nice but there's so many unanswered questions. The majority of us who have been playing for nearly a year now still don't know what the Traveler really is, where it came from, or why it chose us. Who is the Exo Stranger, she doesn't even have a proper name and she's easily the most interesting primary story character. What's the deal with the Warminds, where are the others aside Rasputin? There's so much lore that's not told in the story, hinted at in the grimoire, but mainly ignored. We're loyal fans, tell us about the game universe! It's annoying because we know there's so much there but we're being kept in the dark. I have a theory that the Exo stranger will show up in TTK, she appeared when the Vex were going to destroy the universe so Oryx certainly fits the bill. Maybe we'll finally find out who she was talking to in the the 'Little Light' cutscene. Speaking of which... Cutscenes! we got none in the expansions, and if this really is a high-price high-content successor to vanilla Destiny they we're really owed more.
4. Something new!
This might seem obvious but knowing the previous expansions this needs to be said; We need something new and intuitive to surprise us! The Prison of Elders is a great example of this, bringing new mechanics and a fun co-operative experience to the table. I know it's kind of an arena already, but I think we need a lone-wolf style mission or event, something like the end of Halo Reach. A barren wasteland where enemies just leer at you out of the dust or shadows. It'd be cool if it was a random event, like if you're flying to the Tower or Vestian Outpost your ship crashes and you have to fend off waves till a scout ship comes to save you. There needs to be a risk factor too, like there's a glimmer/motes of light toll on death, but sweet rewards for success. Everything in the game as of current is so predictable, aside the weekly strike resets and the POE rounds. Destiny needs something fresh, even something along the lines of the new modifiers that we got with TTK, but what we're lacking is something new. For a game that requires excessive grinding, the grind needs to at least try to be fun!
Thursday, 25 June 2015
Borderlands The Pre-Sequel review - The ugly ducking in the pack?
Gearbox's hottest 8 out of 10, Borderlands The Pre-Sequel brings everything you loved from borderlands 1 & 2... and makes it ok I guess. It's not a bad game, it just seems very aware of what it is and what it's trying to be. To elaborate, Borderlands 2 went above and beyond in the way of making a stellar game, with new features while still retaining that old humor and crazy gameplay. I can't fault BTPS for it's gameplay, after all it's near identical to the previous titles, but all it's new features feel kinda gimicky and forced. For example the extended jump is nice but running around constantly aware of the ticking oxygen meter is annoying and takes you out of the game to focus on the HUD. The new lazer type weapons are fun until you realize that all the old guns are still more powerful and you can only really spec for one elemental damage. This may not seem like a big deal, but keep in mind there are sections that are literally impossible without the right elemental damage. For example I specifically remember a section where you have to break a wall to proceed but it only breaks with ice type damage. I had no ice type guns. I had to spend all of my hard-earned cash on a bottom-tier ice lazer just to progress. That's not rewarding gameplay, if I hadn't collected that money I would've been stuck there for however long it took.
I'm almost getting a Dark Souls vibe at times too, I've been just churning the main story line so I'm horrifically under-leveled which makes even trash mobs in boss fights a very real threat. You could say this is partially my fault, but the way you're hurried from section to section makes side-quests feel like an afterthought. Side quests should (especially in borderlands) should be inviting and shiny, I remember hearing about the gun that screams when you fire it back in BL2, but nothings draw me to stray from the path of pain and occasional progression that I've been traveling down. I remember being a good few levels beneath the level 13 Boson boss, but it was very satisfying to finally take down.
Let's talk classes, I play Athena - the gladiator. Previously I mained Maya - the Siren, so I'm glad I accidentally speced for a healer again. At first the gladiator class is horribly underwhelming as an understatement. You throw a shield; that's about it. However after going down the medic skill tree the shield now heals me and ricochets and absorbs elemental damage to release. It's pretty fun, the recharge is super high as well making it a very viable option for healing in free time. My tactic is to pop the shield and run at the angriest badass I can see, absorbing the damage while unloading a full clip into him, finally releasing all the stacked damage into him as well. It's proved very effective against grounded bosses, you really do feel like a badass. The classes are the strongest points of BTPS, I haven't had a chance to try out any of the others yet, but the progression and skill sets really add to the otherwise linear and similar gameplay.
The story is hard to get into, you start off traveling to Helios, then it gets taken over by Dahl, and Jack (yes, the handsome one) directs you to save the nearby moon; Elpis. It strays dangerously near that sci-fi trope of having an over-abundance of crazy space names that just sound silly if over used. Psychos and Bandits have been replaced with 'mad men' and 'scavs'. The large Dahl loader robots are particularly hard to take down, but so is everything considering I'm like 3 levels beneath them. Overall I'm finding them fun and challenging, they still have quirky dialog. I want to like them so much but they're missing that craziness, it's hard to believe someone is crazy if they've got technical gear all over them and space hoods. Where's the topless maniacs who ran at you with buzz-saws!? That being said, I do like the design of the suicide psychos, instead of carrying piddly little grenades that they run at you with, these guys carry giant rocket-nuke-missile things on their backs. Badass.
I've got up to the agro-Felicity boss fight (again around 2 levels under her), so I can't make a valid judgment on the ending, but all I can say is I hope they didn't pull a BL2, because I really disliked the ending in that. I hope that it covers all the loose ends with Jack, I have great hopes for it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)